5 thoughts on “Who knows the most funny snacks (a lot of goodness)”
Austin
1 colleague asked me: Is Clinton's wife Hillary?
2 I borrowed money from someone once, and I wanted to say "I will return you when I get the money." "Take you when I have money" Khan
3 The classmates called Yu Jingbo. Let's write a day.
4 Our Chinese teacher: Please turn the book to 120 yuan This in the class all dizzy, the teacher has to nickname "Fairy Fans" Friends watching the discs at home, the CD -ROM quality is not good. My friend said: "Why are there so many Marx?" After a while, I realized that he was Massac!
6 A buddy married and gave him a red envelope. The buddy said politely that he didn't need . I said: Which line, once a year, must be held.
7 In the junior high school, the character reads "White Mao Girl" A boy (Yang Bailao): Two the two pounds of red head ropes and give me Xier ... When Bao Mu Nai ...
8 When I was dinner, she pointed at cauliflower and said: Come to the potatoes. Mere asked: cauliflower? S times continued to point the cauliflower and say: "Tudou " Aunt asked again, "Is it potato or cauliflower?" It occasionally said: Isn't this potato ... Eh, cauliflower? It now it is enough to vomit blood, sorry, the aunt who sells rice
9 to buy cakes, originally wanted to say "two yellow pear pieces and one egg tower", the result is the result. It is said that the "Two Yellow Minding Egg Tower" is even more depressed. The owner understands it ...
10 In college, there is a girl named Liu Yun in our class. Once, other classmates gave her a letter. The "Yun" in the lower half of her "Yun" on the envelope was horizontal, because it was too scribbled, and the horizontal became a bit. As a result, the classmate was called "Liu Mang, who was called Liu Mang, and you had a letter in the corridor." Everyone in the whole corridor ran out to see Liu Mang (hooligan). As a result, the girl named Liu Yun was helplessly called the hooligan for four years.
11 has been in trouble at home for a while, and my mother bought mouse medicine to maintain family tranquility, but no mouse was poured. Older day, my mother got up and looked at the mouse medicine in the door, and said, "Why did anyone eat this medicine? ~~~" The family fainted. Essence Essence
12 English teacher teach grammar, and asked everyone before get out of class: "I finished speaking, do you still understand?" We answered unreasonable: "No!" Toast invites Mingyue, bowing his head to think of his hometown.
14 There was a hot day, and suddenly the power was stopped, so I had to buy a candle to continue the battle. After half an hour, I couldn't stand it. It's hot. "Another person interface:" Can't open it. If you open it, you will blow out the candle. "
15 As the saying goes: killing and setting fire, owing debts to repay money.
16 In physics class, the teacher talked about radioactive elements and said: Radioactive elements are dangerous, and you human beings must stay away from it! Intersection
17 Twitter grape skin without grapes
18 answered a phone call at the company, which was sold by the clothing company. Clothing and the like. I caught the gap between the other party and said: "Our company can't dress uniformly!" The voice said "disturbing" and hanging up after a few seconds.
19 Our university teacher: I want to find a male and one female three classmates ... The classmates began to look around and look for Li Yuchun.
20 to go back to the dormitory in the evening, the road encounters a day of immortal MM, Sui Tail follows has always wanted to talk, but he did not gall forward until Tianxian mm was about to enter the girl building , Step forward and ask the MM loudly: Classmate, are you a woman? In Later ... Later, I enjoyed the two years of white eyes of the Tianxian MM
21 Deng's class, the teacher was excited: how many heroes and children, lingering in the ground ...
22 The graduation work of the classmates is to make a phoenix -like sewing on a black robe -shaped clothing with a big red cloth. The teacher asked: Why should the Phoenix use red instead of other colors? That classmate Excited, blurted out: because the Phoenix wanted to burn in !! (It is estimated that I wanted to say that the fire was reborn). After 3 seconds, the students who answered the defense laughed. My laughed stomach was twisted!
23 junior high school junior high school At that time, the teacher called Back Mulan (the teacher was compared to BT), nervous ... Sister Ah sisters came, and the knife was sharpened to his father and mother (pig and sheep) ......... Laughing, I laughed at myself, but I forgot all the later. Fortunately, the teacher did not punish it ~~
24 Cangtian, the earth, Dou E is more injustice than me!
24 helped LP to buy WSJ. As a result, I did n’t know what to buy after watching it for a long time, so I just took a pack to ask the owner: "Boss, this is easy to use?" The boss (male) stayed After watching me for 5 seconds, I said, "I haven't used this!"
25 When I was young, my father read me writing. There was a very simple word that was wrong. Dad said with a smile and said to my mother: "I found that your son is stupid." I was anxious and told my dad loudly, "Your son is stupid!" -_- b
26 soldiers come to the soil to cover
27 My mother once went to the bank to pay the water fee. After paying the money, the bank said: You are not enough for this money. There are still the second page here. What is my mother: What is the second page The staff: sewage . My mother: My family never drink sewage.
28 Our director of our high school office once again scolded us when the class was not good. Teacher's signature action raised two fingers and said to the classmates: "Students, the key to learning mathematics is three words!" Do more practice! "
30 I said that day I said The girlfriend was stupid, like a pig, she twisted me, hurts, and kept relieved. I was in a hurry and said, "I sue you, you to abuse the pig!"
31 one day, with my dad Mom and my brother went to worship Guanyin . I didn't wake up very much. I said in the front stop: R n brother: -_____ |||| fat Bodhisattva: t _____ t |||||||||||||q|ran 32 on FoxPro class in the second year, a teacher starts to order how many people we have in class, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, hook ... (suddenly stop)
33, the darling mommy called Buy peppercorns. Mummy: "Go and buy a pound of peppercorns." : "One pound?!! How to buy so much?" " A occasionally depressed surprised goes out to buy, and asked specially when he came out of the door:" Are you sure you buy a pound?! " I answers the white eyes of the old lady!" Khan ... It after getting to the vegetable market, the more I think about it, why do you buy a pound? Intersection Take out the phone — confirm again! I answers the same: a pound of peppercorns! Intersection Intersection 28 yuan a pound of peppercorns, the boss told me, bag. When you are going to pay for money, the phone rang ~~~ Mom? Intersection only listening to the phone roaring: "Wrong! Wrong !!! It's not a pound, not a pound, one or two !!!" Intersection Intersection Intersection
34 When the house was handed over, there were many people who came and went, and each security guard would ask. I originally wanted to say that I was the owner, and I often said that I was the landlord ..., It while the security brain was short circuit, I hurried to run.
35 In the year, the party in the courtyard, I played a "thief", became famous, and was favored by girls. I called me "thief" on weekdays. One day I wandered to the Asian trade, and the Harbin girls, who had a quick word in the class, saw it, and shouted at me excitedly: "Oh, thief -thief -thief", which made me immediately be by the people next to them. Hold ...
The 1 units of blessings, a leader said, "I wish everyone a happy body ..." Hold, nothing.
2 I once helped the boss book a hotel. I would like to ask people if there are any services such as free Internet access, but I couldn't think of what to say, so I asked the other party: "Excuse me, you have here you have any What special services? After a long time of slippers, no, ask everyone: Why did my slippers go?
4 In shopping, my friend suddenly exclaimed: "Wow! 'Virgo Bookstore"! "I was shocked, looked up, a plaque, four big characters on the book - !!
5 I used to buy lamb skewers extended 4 fingers to say "3 lamb skewers" The boss covered "How many?" I stretched out 3 fingers and said "4" ...
6 Our general manager's surname Zhou, once he called, I was driving, and said nervously, "Premier Zhou ... "
7 My surname is Zhu, management unit machine room. One time someone hit me: "Chicken chief, are you in the pig room?" At that time, the guy scolded the guy for a meal
8 in the cafeteria queued, hearing a boy next to him, "Master, come to the bowl '' Bullets of cauliflower 'soup! "
9 I was very hungry and hungry at a meal at the rice restaurant. finally couldn't bear to hold the table roaring. I wanted to say that I couldn't get on the rice line. I lifted the table! The results: "The boss !!!! I will eat the table without getting on the rice line !!!!" The silent 3 seconds of the shop to the table ... shame ...
10 My parents quarreled, and my dad said angrily: "I roll it out!"
11 in high school in high school, after A scored a ball, it was passed to B selflessly, B easy to score. After a while, B got the ball, A shouted to pass the ball loudly. B casts the ball by himself. As a result, A was angrily shouting: I really blinded my dog's eyes ... The smile of the audience
12 Impression of the squad leader in elementary school was extremely serious. After boiling, the squad leader finally couldn't bear it after the order was maintained several times. He stood up and shouted at the table: Who quarreled and interrupted his mouth !!! ... When the whole class was quiet n13, we Asked how the battle of a buddy Manchester United said, he said excitedly: "Manchester United lost, Beckham received two yellow plates!" n 15 When I was in college, a teacher gave lectures and talked about a new type of material, saying: "The sexual function of this material is unparalleled by old materials ... ah no, performance and function ..."
16 just went to college, military training, the company commander did not know where the accent was, shouting password- "to the left!" "Stepping the right drill!" 17 Girls order: Master, stir -fry a plate of hot and sour potato shreds, do not put potatoes!
18 In the second year of high school, our Chinese teacher was an old teacher who had just transferred from Nanchang to Beijing. His accent was heavy. His son was on the Department of Tsinghua Architecture, which was also his purpose of coming to Beijing. He was proud of his son. He always talked about his son. Tsinghua) University toad (architecture). .. .. If the moth is there, wouldn't it be a snack if you arrived at the frog and toad. .. ..
19 cooking at noon, my mother gave me a pot of carrots: "Go, cut the carrot into meat!"
20 asked me together yesterday. How to write the festival? I replied: Add a festival to the festive festival under the festive head! All the staff are hilarious! I didn't respond for a while ~~~~~~~~!
21 When I was looking for a job that year, the examiner asked me to graduate from the year. I originally wanted to say in 2000, and the result was excited: "Two thousand years ago ..." is more than the waterfall sweat. . "
22 just after 10 minutes of class, I raised my hand at the same table and said: Teacher I want to go to the toilet. The English teacher said very unhappy: How big are you going to the toilet?
22 He has a classmate who has been reviewing the third level of the computer. One day he played football, and the other classmate took the ball to the bottom line. He only listened to him shouting: Enter! Enter! (Chuanzhong)
23 Remember to buy a fruit called Elizabeth once. I opened my mouth and said: Boss, how much is Shakespeare? The boss stayed on the spot
24 Physics teacher's talk: "This is a thick spring, I push it from both ends, see, is it confidential (constipation)?"
25 Listen to classmates, . A girl in their dormitory once went to buy sanitary napkins, said to the boss: a pack of sanitary napkins. The boss actually asked: Do you want three fresh or spicy? Then the classmate froze and said, "Sanxian, I'm afraid that I can't stand it. Essence Essence
26 Master of the University, on education psychology. Late ... Enter the classroom. I glanced at the blackboard. The old professor was angry and asked the sister to answer the question of the blackboard. u003CSexy and Sexual Theory>, this is too difficult to talk about. "The whole class turned up. (Note. Professor original title: u003Core -rational and sensuality>
2 50 new mouths have fallen into the earth! ——Liexiakou 2007 Cool Hot Edition (ZT) 27 I was sitting on the ground as a very good male classmate. I asked for a concern: "Your buttocks hurt!" As a result, I accidentally said it. "Your butt is killed." Khan ~~~ The brother stood up and patted his buttocks, put a fart, and said, "No death, still panting!" I fainted
28 and The leader and other people drank, raised the wine glass and said loudly: "Let's do everything!" At that time, the brain was too hot ......
29 once, our newspaper photographer interviewed a female star to return, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star. Talking about how he and the star are familiar at the meeting. The boss looked at a lot of photos on the table and opened a joke: I see you have become his royal photographer. Throughout the sound of "Japan". Since then, this poor photographer is called "Daily Photographer". When he works overtime, of course, he has become "Night". , Is there any hand paper to fill the hunger card?
31 We have colleagues on business trips and dealers ask for dinner. The dealer should urinate. The dealer said that there is a bathroom on the opposite side. If you go to the door, we are said to the door. Those who eat opposite can be free. In order to save two cents, our colleagues walked straight and said straightforwardly to the toilet: "I'm here to eat!" After the year, the customer called when the goods arrived before the festival, because these days in the past few days, I couldn't figure out the content of the order, so I asked: What are you?
33 I have a friend who has just watched the Biography of the Heroes of the Eagle. I am very interested in the "Dog Stick Stick" and often jokes to others. A day as usual. He kicked others. Drinking: "Kick the dog's legs!" Everyone laughed, and he felt embarrassed, and he kicked and shouted, "Dogs kick your legs!" R N I want to find a job in a restaurant because it is still a child, and it is the first time to work. Ask if you need to be more implicitly This results: "Manager, do you need a thug here?" In almost found a hole in a hole
35 to the market once to the market once Buy vegetables and prepare to dinner. A Korean friend bought lettuce and wanted 2 pieces. He gave all the change on his body to hawkers and lacked a dime, so he said to hawkers- "My hair is given to you, so there is no hair. " . The hawker was dumb, for a long time, answered- " I don't want your hair. " "
36 The manager generally said to smoking: All those who smoke are strangled !!
37 When KFC out of Fragrant Wings, because I did not look at the advertisement, it was Listening to others, I always thought it was Liu Xiang spoke to KFC. When he arrived, he told the waiter that I wanted Liu Xiang to show his wings ...
38 kfc Sudan Red Incident, I went to KFC, the waiter asked, you, you, you What do you want? I didn't think about it: a pair of Sudan red. The waiter immediately had a sturdy expression
39 to get off work with a few colleagues a few days ago with a few colleagues. A lot, a fat waiter was busy, and shouted together, "The waiter ~~", the girl ran over: "How many nodes? "At that time, we fell all, and then went to this dinner again. When ordering," the waiter's checkout ", and then shouted" Order! " Intersection "
40 meets a colleague in the bathroom at noon. Suddenly I didn't know what word to say hello. The ghost asked God to ask," Did you eat it? " "Asked, I was annoyed and embarrassed. The colleague replied:" Eat, what about you? "I am dizzy ~~~~~~
41 My colleague will ask the exchange rate of the RMB and the yen. Several brother watched "Prison" and performed the shot of the killing of the blade from his mouth. The boss suddenly popped out: "I K, I can talk and serve in the blade. Essence Essence "
43 At noon one day, my mother asked the elder brother to move the dining table. My brother didn't move for a long time, and the mother said like this: " Hear hear hearing No? ! Tell you to move the table for two kilometers " = _ = !!!
44 Chairman of the Trade Union to give a generous speech, the last sentence reached the climax: gay, let us this year的工作做得比明年更好！全场皆倒。 rnrn45 我们老师很厉害，有一天他这么说："把作业拿出来，我们对一下答案，对的打叉，然后Write the correct answer on it ... "
46 called a friend who has not been contacted for a long time, and learned that he was applying for" suspension of salary " n47 so many coquettish rivers and mountains, Lead countless heroes to shoot big sculptures ...
48 Go to the cinema to watch "Pirates of the Caribbean", there is a trailer for "Transformers" before the movie. When he got up "Megatron", he couldn't remember his team called "Battay Tiger". Because it was too excited, he exclaimed a little "really handsome, Nanba Tian! " The is terrible at that time, there was no sound effect at that time, and N -many people stared at me and laughed ... I lost the dead! 49 and a group of friends to eat It is estimated that a person is betrayed by his brother, and the depressed is sullen and drank a lot of beer, and then he stood up and yelled at Brothers! Not to be sold!! It estimated that I wanted to say it. I wanted to say it. Brothers are not used to sell At the time, there were more than a dozen people on a table of people lying on the table.
1. One day, a fudge walks on the street. . She was walking and suddenly said, "Ah! My legs are so soft!" 2, there was a surname of a person in the past, Eat myself .... 3, a banana and a girlfriend dating, walking on the street, the weather is hot, Mr. Banana took off his clothes, and then his girlfriend fell down 4. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and flowed a lot of blood and became red beans; the pus has been flowing, and it became a soybean; the wound was scarred, and the black beans finally became black beans. 5, one day, the bean paste bag was walking on the road, and suddenly a car accident, the belly was broken. Before dying, he looked at his belly and said, "Oh, I am a bean paste bag." 6, Xiaoming Xinyin's hair, came to school the next day, the classmates saw his new hairstyle and laughed: Xiaoming, your head shape is like a kite! Xiaoming felt very wronged and ran outside and crying. Crying and crying ~ He flew up ... 7, the match stick suddenly felt itchy, so he reached out and scratched himself and burned himself to death. 8, on board, a young lady asked a little girl and said, "Why wouldn't the plane fly as high as the stars? 'Ah! " 9, there is a pair of corn fell in love So they decided to get married The day of marriage The popcorn beside: Have you seen our corn? popcorn: dear, people wore a wedding dress 10, one day, a three -point steak walking on the street, suddenly he saw a five -pointer steak in front, but there was no I would be Q: Why didn't they say hello? Answer: Because they are not familiar with ... 11, there is a fat man ... Next ... The result became ......... dead fat man .. 12, a green apple went out to go shopping, and suddenly saw a red apple, he Just say to the Red Apple ... The secret love me, otherwise why do you blush ... 13, the teacher played a Beethoven's song at the music class Xiaoming asked Xiaohua: "Do you understand music?" Xiaohua: "Yes" Xiaoming: "Do you know what the teacher is playing?" Xiaohua: "Piano." 14 , Xiao A said to Xiao B: Dig plug .... It's raining outside! Intersection I saw it Is Little B very excited: Yeah, I saw you 15, the snake asked the big snake brother in a panic .. "Brother, are we poisonous?" The big snake said: "You ask, ask Why do you? "Xiao Snake said:" I accidentally bit my tongue just now. " 16, I used to go shopping together with tomato armor and tomato B and then suddenly a truck rushed out one day. Pressing the tomato armor in the past Tomato B pointed at the tomato armor and laughed [Ha. Ha. Harbin sauce ~] 17, turtle and rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran Go to the front .. This to see a snail climb very slowly and slowly .. Say to him: You come up, I will carry you ... and then .. Snail comes up ... . After a while ... the turtle saw another ant .. Say to him: You come up too ... So the ant also came up. . In the ant came up .. Seeing the snail above .. I said "Hello" Do you know what the snail is said ?? Snail said: You hurry up, this, this, this The turtles are so fast ... 18, Xiaoming said, "Akang, ask you" a shark ate a mung bean, what did it become? " said," I said, "I am I do n’t know, what is the answer? " Xiaoming said:" The answer is "mung bean paste (mung bean shark)", you are stupid! " 19, Xiaoming went to the classroom to say: There are many ants in the toilet, The teacher suddenly thought of the word ANT of Ant, so I tested Xiaoming: What does the ant say? Xiaoming's face was blank ............ I said: ants ... 20, teacher: "You finally came! Why did you come to class yesterday without class? ? " Student:" Because .. Because my mother fell off the stairs ... " The teacher:" Oh! So that, the mother was injured, so you didn't come. "Student : "No ... my dad was injured ..." Teacher: "Why do your mother fall off the stairs from the stairs?" Student: "Because ... my dad has a woman outside ..." : What ?. What does it have to do with your mother falling off the stairs? " Student: Because of their fight .. My mother fell and my dad was injured by my mother." Teacher: "Oh ... so because you sent your father to the hospital, so did you not come to class?" students: "No .., the woman outside sent my dad." : "Then why didn't you come to class?" Student: "Because I have slept over my head ..." The teacher: "What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs!" N student: "No, I ... I just mention it by the way ..." 21, son: "Mom! Give me 100 yuan." Mother: "No!" : "If you give me 100 yuan, I will tell you, you are not here this afternoon, what your father says to the maid." In the mother listened, and quickly took out 100 yuan for him! : "Dad said," Don't forget to hot clothes later "..." 22, worm: Xiaohua, do you use my pencil? Xiaohua: No, I am useless. Words: Are you really useless? Xiaohua: I'm really useless! Sworm: Alas, you are the 17th person who admits that he is useless 23, one day Xiaoqiang asked his father: "Dad, am I silly child?" Dad said, "Stupid child How can you be a silly child? " 24, a chief of a babies said to a person who was about to be executed,: What do you have? He said: I want to eat lychee. This chief said: This season did not pull This he said: I can wait 25, one day, a family of fire, The son is still inside. M mother shouted outside the house, "Son ... You are doing it ... you can't get out ..." Sons answered ... "I'm wearing socks ..." M mother said, "What socks are you wearing a fire ..." The son hasn't come out yet ... The mother shouted nervously, "Son, what are you doing? Come out ~ It's a fire, staying in it ..." The son said, "I'm taking off socks ..." 26, two steamed buns love each other So they decided to get married The day of marriage By the other steamed bun , the steamed bun asked the flower roll next to me: Did you see our steamed bun? Flower rolls: dear, people's heads 27, a pair of men and women are eating dinner That girl always asked the boy: Do you love me? I continued to eat dinner at a glance The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me? Is finally said: Love girls ask again: How do you prove? Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket, and asked the girl: Do you have ten yuan? The girls took ten yuan to the boy. Yuan put it on the table . After a while ..... The girl is very angry and asked the boy: Do you want to prove that you love me The boy said that I have proved it! !! Forty in front of you! The long time ago, there was a beautiful love story. In the story of the male and female protagonists in the story, for their love, they need to abandon their beliefs and endure the contempt of the world. , You're from Lao La ~ Guessing puzzle: Standing with two cows standing next to one bull, guessing three words Answer: Three -headed cow 4. Stone and rice cake fights, stones fly up I kicked the rice cake into the sea in one foot .............. The lovers have been in the past for a lifetime, but the boys need to take military service, so they dated the girls and gave the girl a diamond ring. I met the girl today after the year. At that time, the ring was used as a wedding ring. After 3 years, the girl had been waiting for the boy, but she couldn't wait. She was too sad. She threw the diamond ring into the sea. , Walk away in the country. However, the boy actually has been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood the dating place, so she always became her legacy . Fishing, guess what he caught? year cakes !!! 5. Dumplings are boys or girls Answer Boys because dumplings have foreskin 6. One day when he was hit by a car, he yelled, "Oh!" Since then, he has become Xiaohuang !! 9. When will Taiwan want to unify? Is when buying instant noodles 10. A pine and Abai have nothing to chat with each other. A Song: "Recalling children's time, the happiest is Children's Day." Aba: "After ten years is Youth Day." Ason The year is Father's Day. " Abai:" It's the Old Man's Day in more than decades. " Aatong:" Another decades. " Abai:" Qingming " 11. Soldiers:" Thirst ... thirst ... " Cao Cao:" Everyone persist for a while! I used to go to this place, remember that there is a Merlin nearby, and then go for a while may be here " The soldiers:" Oh ￣￣￣￣ ￣￣￣￣ r ￣￣￣ ￣￣￣ ￣￣￣ " half an hour later -Cao Ren:" Lord! The expedition found the team found the team! A lot of water sources! " Cao Cao:" Hahahaha, do you hear it? Finally, there is a water " After a group of animals opened the party, they rushed into the 7-11 convenience store to buy things. Because they were too noisy, they were beaten out by the clerk, but leaving the lamb in the store alone. Why? The convenience store is not snoring for 24 hours .............. 22. The glass and coffee cup cross the road. Suddenly someone shouted: The car is coming! This cup was hit by the car, but the coffee cup was okay. Why? The coffee cup has ears! 43. Xiaohong asked: When you mix coffee, use your right hand or left hand Xiaomei said: right hand Xiaohong said: Oh, you are so amazing, you will not be afraid of hotness, like me like me, like me All spoons. 44. Do you know why penguins live in Antarctica? Because it is cold there ... 46. A logging worker go to work at Workers: You can try it in the forest in front ... see you can see a few trees in one minute ... .. After a minute .... Workers: Wow ... 20 trees in one minute ... too amazing ... Where did you work before? Workers: Sahara Forest ... Gongtou: I haven't heard of it ... I have only heard of the Sahara Desert .............................. Workers: Yes ... later changed the name! 47. Wife: I am really blind. I will marry you when I step on shit. : I am really blind to marry you when I step on the shit. This shit: I am unlucky! Lying there and being stepped on by you ... 48. Tell a story. In the past, a pair of lovers set a lifetime, but the boys needed to take military service, so they set an oath with the girls , and gave the girls a one. Diamond ring, promised to meet the girl today three years later. At that time, the ring was used as for a wedding ring. has finally passed by 3 years, but the boy heard the news of the woman getting married on the return of the home. He was too sad, and despairing thrown the diamond ring into the sea. Three days later, the ship leaned as shore. The boy went to the small restaurant on the street for dinner. A fish came on. He pinched The fish took a bite, bit into a hard thing, spit it out, guess what he saw ???????? !!!!!!!!!!!!! 53. One day, a pair of black stool saw a white stool, black stool asked: Why are you growing so beautiful and so beautiful Intersection This stool is very angry! He said: I am not a bowel movement! I am an ice cream !!! 55. A software company is recruiting This day, a dog came to apply for application. The supervisor felt very depressed and wanted to drive the dog out. The dog took out a piece of paper and a pen, and wrote a few words very neatly: Please do not discriminate against animals. The director knew that this was not an ordinary dog. Out of curiosity, he decided to try it. The director took out the condition of the application and read: 1. You must type. 2. Must be programmed. 3. At least proficient in a foreign language. So before the dog came to the computer, he played an article very skilled and wrote a very complicated program. Then came to the supervisor and said to the supervisor: Meow! Intersection 1. There was a altar buried underground. After a thousand years, what did it become? Answer: alcohol. 2. There is a dog, it goes and goes to the United Kingdom. Answer: DOG. 3. Teachers in the class should draw up the Northern Song Dynasty, piglets, puppies, and kittens. Who will the teacher call? Is; puppy, because Wangwang Xianbei (first back). 4. Which two vegetables have mobile phones? : radish and greens, because of radish and greens, each has Sony Ericsson (love). 5. Why do people go to bed to sleep? : The bed will not come over by yourself. 6. If there is a car, the driver is prince and the passenger is princess. Who is this car? : If. 7. Jinmu, water, fire and soil, who has the longest leg? : Fire, because of ham sausage. 8. Butterflies, ants, spiders, crickets, they worked together, which one did not get paid in the end? : , because 蜈 (non -merit) is not affected by Lu. 9. The nose of the elephant in the zoo is the longest. Who is the second longest? Answer: small elephant. 10. It turned out to be the Spartan 800 Warriors. Why did the movie become 300? Answer: Wu Bai went to sing ~~
The first one is more funny This story took place in an ancient temple 200 years ago. He was horrible first, funny in the middle, and finally tragic. Think about it before. The ghostly fart. Essence Dead
The white rabbit jumping to the bread room, asking, "Boss, do you have a hundred small bread?" More " " like this ... "The little white rabbit walked down with a desire. The next day, the little white rabbit jumps to the bread room, "Boss, is there a hundred small bread?" The boss: "I'm sorry, still not" Ah ... "The little white rabbit walked down again. The third day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bread room, "Boss, is there a hundred small bread?" The boss said happily: "Yes, yes, today we have the One hundred small bread !! " The white rabbit took out the money:" Great, I buy two! " (2) In the forest, On the road, it encountered a giraffe that was rolling marijuana, The white rabbit said to the giraffe giraffe, why do you do something hurt yourself? to see See how beautiful this forest is, let's run together in nature! It giraffe to see marijuana cigarettes and see the little white rabbit, so throw the cannabis smoke behind him, Running in the forest. In the elephant who was preparing to suck Gochine, The white rabbit said to the elephant What about it? In look at how beautiful this forest is, let's run together in nature! It elephants to see the cocaine and look at the little white rabbit, so take the cocaine behind Throw, follow the little white rabbit and giraffe running in the forest. In the lion that is preparing to hit the sea*, The white rabbit said to the lion: lion lion, Why do you do something hurting yourself? In see how beautiful this forest is, let us run together in nature! Lion to look at the syringe and see the little white rabbit, so let's take it The syringe threw it behind him, and the little white rabbit was having a meal fiercely Elephant and giraffe scared to shake: Why do you want to hit the little white rabbit? The is so kind, care about us The health of the health also calls us close to nature. The lion said angrily: This bastard rabbit, every time I stabbed*pill, I pulled me . (3) The first day, the little white rabbit went to fish by the river, and he couldn't catch anything. He went home. The next day, the little white rabbit went to fish by the river again, and he still caught anything and went home. On the third day, the little white rabbit just arrived at the river, and a big fish jumped out of the river and yelled at the little white rabbit: Is fucking to dare to use Hu Yibu as a bait, I am Just flatten you! (4) In order to test the strength of the police of the United States, Hong Kong, and mainland China, the United Nations put three rabbits in three forests to see who found the rabbit first. N's first forest was an American police. They spent half a day for a full half -day meeting to formulate combat plans, strict division of labor, and then sent special troops to quickly enter the forest for carpet search. As a result, the meeting was delayed. R n Then it was the Hong Kong police officer. They sent more than 100 people and dozens of police cars to line up outside the forest. ...... 半天过去了, 没动静. 飞虎队进入森林, 搜索一遍, 没结果, 任务失败! rn最后是中国警察, 只有四个, 先打了一天麻将, 黄昏时一人Take a police stick into the forest. Within five minutes, when a scream of animals came from the forest, the Chinese police pumped a cigarette and said and laughed. Later, a bear with a swollen face was dragged. By: Don't fight anymore, I am a rabbit ......... (five) The white rabbit walks in the forest. I gave the little white rabbit two big ear stickers and said, "I let you not wear a hat. Little White Rabbit is very wronged. The next day, she walked out of the house with a hat and met again. In the big gray wolf, he stepped up and "slap" and gave the little white rabbit two big mouths, saying "I let you wear a hat. " This is depressed. After thinking about it for a long time, I finally decided to go to the Tiger of the Forest Tiger to complain. Explaining the situation, the tiger said," Okay, I know, I will deal with this matter. I will deal with it. I want to believe in the organization. "On the same day, the tiger found his buddies." You can't do this, it makes it difficult for me to do it. "Said to wipe the ash on the table:" Can you see like this? " You can say that rabbits come over and find a piece of meat for me! She found fat, and you said you want to be thin. She found thin, and you said you want to be fat. Can't you beat her? Of course, you can say that. Rabbit came and found me a woman. She found it full, and you said you like slim. She found a slimmer, and you said you like plump. It can be rational and powerful and powerful. "The big gray wolf nodded frequently, clapped his hands quickly, and rushed to the new peak again. Unexpectedly, the above guidance work was heard by the little white rabbit who was weeding to the tiger's house. . This hate in my heart. The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. Why is it so coincidental? The big gray wolf said, "Rabbit, come here, find me a piece of meat for me go. "Rabbit said," Then, are you fat or thin? " "The big ash wolf listened, sinking in his heart, another joy, and his heart, fortunately, there was a plan B. He also said," Rabbit, Mali Er finds me a woman. "Rabbit asked:" Then, do you like plump or slim? " "The big gray wolf was silent for 2 seconds, and raised his hand more severely to the rabbit two big ears." Damn, I let you not wear a hat. " (6) Xiong and rabbits are in the forest. After the bear asked the rabbit," Are you hairy? " "The rabbit said," Not dropped ~ " So the bear picked up the rabbit to wipe the buttocks. ? " The boss said," No. " T" Little White Rabbit asked, "Is there a carrot? " In I don't know how many days, a little black rabbit came to this store and asked the boss:" Boss, do you have carrots? " " The boss shook his head angrily: "No. " This Black Rabbit ran away" 嗖 "after listening. The next day the Black Rabbit came to this store again to ask:" Boss, is there a carrot? " " The boss was very angry:" No! " Ask me again and pull your teeth with pliers! " This Black Rabbit ran away" 嗖 "after listening. The third day, the Black Rabbit came to this store again, and asked timidly:" Boss, do you have pliers? " " " The boss said angrily, "No. " T" Little Black Rabbit asked, "Is there a carrot? " The boss was angry, grabbed the little black rabbit, took out a small hammer, and knocked off the teeth of the little black rabbit. The fourth day of the Black Rabbit came to this store again, vague Unclear asked: "Boss, is there a carrot juice? " (9) The giraffe said: Little rabbit, I really hope you can know how good a long neck is. No matter what delicious things, I will slowly pass me when I eat it. Long neck, that delicious can enjoy for a long time. The rabbit looked at him expressionlessly. and in summer, rabbits, the cold water slowly flowing through my long neck, it was so It's delicious. There is a long neck! Rabbit, can you imagine it? The rabbit said slowly: Have you spit it? (ten) One day, kangaroos drove in the car in the car On the road of the countryside, I suddenly saw the little white rabbit in the middle of the road, and the ears and body were almost lying on the ground and seemed to be listening to what ... So the kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously: "Little White Rabbit What are you listening to? " " A large truck passed by half an hour ago ... " " Wow .. So God! ..How did you know? .. " " He XX! My neck and legs are so broken .. "
The child is called Xiao Ming ... Xiaoming is particularly stupid ... So Xiaoming's mother wanted to throw Xiao Ming away ... So he ... Mom said, "Xiao Ming, how good you look at the zoo ... There are elephants ... Tiger ... " then ·, my mother took the car home ... and then ... 12 o'clock in the middle of the night The door bell sounded; Ding Dong ... Ding Dong ... ... M mother to open the door ... Xiaoming stood at the door ... "Mom. I came back ... "
So the next day ... the next day ... M mother made a train · bring Xiaoming to the zoo in the suburbs ... N mother said, "Xiao Ming, how good you see this zoo ... There are elephants Tigers ... you play with them · Mom goes to buy ice cream ... " So my mother returned home by the train ... and then ... 12 o'clock in the middle of the night The doorbell rang; Ding Dong ... Ding Dong ... ... M mother to open the door ... Xiaoming stood at the door ... "Mom.我回来了····” rnrn······· rn第三天· 妈妈决心一定要把小明扔掉··· rn于是妈妈坐飞机Taking Xiaoming to · Foreign Zoo ... Mom said, "Xiaoming, how good you see this zoo ... There are elephants tigers ... You play with them · Mom goes to buy you ice cream ... " ······· then my mother bought a aircraft ticket by herself. At night ... 12 o'clock ... The doorbells did not sound ... and then another day ... Life ········· The that is like this ... M mother threw Xiaoming away ... Star . The celebrity is more popular than Mike Jackson. n's day of Masong ... everyone goes to pick up the plane ... The airport is full of people · So there were four planes ·
The first plane landed ... people all shouted, "Masongma Song ...! Intersection " . But ... The Liu Dehua is going down the plane ... ... So Andy Lau gone ...
The second plane landed ... everyone shouted: Masongma pine!!!!! , but Zhang Xueyou came down from the plane ... Then Zhang Xueyou also left ...
The third plane landed ... The people shouted: Matson Ma Song!!!!! So came down to Guo Fucheng ... So Guo Fucheng also left ... ·
The fourth plane is here ... everyone shouted: Matson Ma Song!!!!!! Who is going down ... ······························· n dawn ...? Isn't it drip ...
is Xiaoming ...
I ...
too long, but it is really cold ~ you look at it slowly
I. Seagulls Q: There is a man who is a blind man. He had a sea difficulty when he was young. After many years, he went around the place. He ordered 1 sea in a restaurant by the sea gull meat. After he ate it, he called the waiter and asked if it was a seagull meat. The waiter replied that it was, and then the man committed suicide. Why? . Jumping the train Q: A person takes the train to the neighboring town to see a doctor. On the way back, the train passed through a tunnel, and the person jumped from . Why? rn三.水草rn问：有个男人跟他女友去河边散步，突然他的女友掉进河里了，那个二子就急忙跳到水里去找，可没r N found his girlfriend, he left here sadly. After a few years, he swims back. At this time, he saw an old man fishing, but the old He asked the old bald donkey why the fish did not touch a little water grass, and the old man said: The river never has long water plants. Speaking of the man suddenly jumped into the water and committed suicide. . The story of the funeral Q: There are three mothers and daughters, the mother died, the sisters went to the funeral, the sister met a very handsome distant relative at the funeral, and gave him at first sight. But the man was gone after the funeral, and the sister couldn't find him. After a month, my sister killed her sister, why? rn五.半根火柴rn问：有一个人在沙漠中，头朝下死了，身边散落着几个行李箱子，而这个人手里紧紧地抓着半个火柴r n, how did this person die? 6. Full ground wood cutting Q: There are two dwarfs in the circus, blind dwarf is shorter than another dwarf, the circus needs only one dwarf, of course the dwarf in the circus is The shorter, the better. Two dwarfs decide to be shorter than whom. He died. I only found the furniture made of wood and the wood chips on the ground at his house. Ask him why committed suicide? . Seven. Tap the door in the middle of the night Q: A person lives in the hut on the top of the mountain, and he heard a knock on the door in the middle of the night. R n knocked on the door, went to open the door, or no one, if it was a few times. The next day, someone found a dead corpse at the foot of the mountain, and the police came to take away the of the mountain. Why?
1, before being trapped with a girlfriend with his girlfriend, his girlfriend said to her flesh to say that it was a seagull meat. He lived and his girlfriend did not eat. After the taste of the meat, I knew the difference, suicide 2. After the tunnel, I thought I was blind again, and the psychological collapse and committed suicide 3.一次看到那个帅哥rn5，热气球出问题，需要扔1个东西和人，气球上人抽火柴决定谁被扔下去，那个倒霉的孩子抽到了半根被扔下来了，r N6, Gaopuscus cut off the furniture legs of the blind dwarf, let the blind man think that he grew taller, so he committed suicide 7, and the deceased went up the mountain again and again, but pushed up and down when the owner of the house opened the door again and again.
The father looked at his son's accumulation order and found that there were several subjects that were not as good as Father: Your foreign geography is not good : Because I have never been to a foreign country! Father: Your history is not good : I was born too late, most of the previous things do not know. Father: How can citizens fail? This: I am not an adult, isn't it a citizen at all! Intersection ___ The first episode of fun news.
The high school classmates told me that one time he took a bus with his classmates, because his classmates were fat and did not repair the border, he shortly after the classmate got on the car, there was a little sister who used it very much. The naive and lovely voice said: Auntie. This sitting position allows you to sit. This classmates are very strange. Why would this little girl want to sit down and let her, so he asked curiously: Why do you let to the eldest sister? Intersection Unexpectedly, the little sister repaired with a strong repulsive answer: The teacher said that when he saw a pregnant woman, he would be to give up! Intersection … The whole car is dumb!
Stocks are courage ...
During the philosophy of a university, they taught what kind of courage is. A student on the test papers "Write" This is "this is to make it. .. .. As a result, I got a ... …… ___
The last lesson
In the last lesson, the teacher asked: Does anyone want to express their opinions? Afu posted ... Afu: The teacher taught very well. The teacher nodded happily, and asked: Then you think it is worthless to push with your classmates ... Afu: Very worth ... The teacher smiled very satisfied: What is your reason? Afu said slowly: Sit. Harmful. he…. I only saw the teacher's face suddenly changed ... college students
In a college student to work in his uncle's farm in the summer vacation. One king, and asked him if he would squeeze ... College students said: I am a college student, there is nothing that can't. After 1 hour. 2 small ... 3 hours ... After a long time, he finally came back. Uncle asked: Why is that time? College students replied: Squeeze milk is easy, but it is more troublesome to let the cattle sitting on the pedal.
1 colleague asked me: Is Clinton's wife Hillary?
2 I borrowed money from someone once, and I wanted to say "I will return you when I get the money."
"Take you when I have money"
Khan
3 The classmates called Yu Jingbo. Let's write a day.
4 Our Chinese teacher: Please turn the book to 120 yuan
This in the class all dizzy, the teacher has to nickname "Fairy Fans" Friends watching the discs at home, the CD -ROM quality is not good. My friend said: "Why are there so many Marx?" After a while, I realized that he was Massac!
6 A buddy married and gave him a red envelope. The buddy said politely that he didn't need
. I said: Which line, once a year, must be held.
7 In the junior high school, the character reads "White Mao Girl"
A boy (Yang Bailao): Two the two pounds of red head ropes and give me Xier ...
When Bao Mu Nai ...
8 When I was dinner, she pointed at cauliflower and said: Come to the potatoes.
Mere asked: cauliflower?
S times continued to point the cauliflower and say: "Tudou
" Aunt asked again, "Is it potato or cauliflower?"
It occasionally said: Isn't this potato ... Eh, cauliflower?
It now it is enough to vomit blood, sorry, the aunt who sells rice
9 to buy cakes, originally wanted to say "two yellow pear pieces and one egg tower", the result is the result. It is said that the "Two Yellow Minding Egg Tower"
is even more depressed. The owner understands it ...
10 In college, there is a girl named Liu Yun in our class. Once, other classmates gave her a letter. The "Yun" in the lower half of her "Yun" on the envelope was horizontal, because it was too scribbled, and the horizontal became a bit. As a result, the classmate was called "Liu Mang, who was called Liu Mang, and you had a letter in the corridor." Everyone in the whole corridor ran out to see Liu Mang (hooligan). As a result, the girl named Liu Yun was helplessly called the hooligan for four years.
11 has been in trouble at home for a while, and my mother bought mouse medicine to maintain family tranquility, but no mouse was poured. Older day, my mother got up and looked at the mouse medicine in the door, and said, "Why did anyone eat this medicine? ~~~" The family fainted. Essence Essence
12 English teacher teach grammar, and asked everyone before get out of class: "I finished speaking, do you still understand?" We answered unreasonable: "No!" Toast invites Mingyue, bowing his head to think of his hometown.
14 There was a hot day, and suddenly the power was stopped, so I had to buy a candle to continue the battle. After half an hour, I couldn't stand it. It's hot. "Another person interface:" Can't open it. If you open it, you will blow out the candle. "
15 As the saying goes: killing and setting fire, owing debts to repay money.
16 In physics class, the teacher talked about radioactive elements and said: Radioactive elements are dangerous, and you human beings must stay away from it! Intersection
17 Twitter grape skin without grapes
18 answered a phone call at the company, which was sold by the clothing company. Clothing and the like. I caught the gap between the other party and said: "Our company can't dress uniformly!"
The voice said "disturbing" and hanging up after a few seconds.
19 Our university teacher: I want to find a male and one female three classmates ...
The classmates began to look around and look for Li Yuchun.
20 to go back to the dormitory in the evening, the road encounters a day of immortal MM, Sui Tail follows
has always wanted to talk, but he did not gall forward until Tianxian mm was about to enter the girl building
, Step forward and ask the MM loudly: Classmate, are you a woman?
In Later ... Later, I enjoyed the two years of white eyes of the Tianxian MM
21 Deng's class, the teacher was excited: how many heroes and children, lingering in the ground ...
22 The graduation work of the classmates is to make a phoenix -like sewing on a black robe -shaped clothing with a big red cloth.
The teacher asked: Why should the Phoenix use red instead of other colors?
That classmate Excited, blurted out: because the Phoenix wanted to burn in !! (It is estimated that I wanted to say that the fire was reborn). After 3 seconds, the students who answered the defense laughed. My laughed stomach was twisted!
23 junior high school junior high school At that time, the teacher called Back Mulan (the teacher was compared to BT), nervous
... Sister Ah sisters came, and the knife was sharpened to his father and mother (pig and sheep) .........
Laughing, I laughed at myself, but I forgot all the later. Fortunately, the teacher did not punish it ~~
24 Cangtian, the earth, Dou E is more injustice than me!
24 helped LP to buy WSJ. As a result, I did n’t know what to buy after watching it for a long time, so I just took a pack to ask the owner: "Boss, this is easy to use?" The boss (male) stayed After watching me for 5 seconds, I said, "I haven't used this!"
25 When I was young, my father read me writing. There was a very simple word that was wrong. Dad said with a smile and said to my mother: "I found that your son is stupid." I was anxious and told my dad loudly, "Your son is stupid!" -_- b
26 soldiers come to the soil to cover
27 My mother once went to the bank to pay the water fee. After paying the money, the bank said: You are not enough for this money. There are still the second page here.
What is my mother: What is the second page
The staff: sewage
. My mother: My family never drink sewage.
28 Our director of our high school office once again scolded us when the class was not good. Teacher's signature action
raised two fingers and said to the classmates: "Students, the key to learning mathematics is three words!" Do more practice! "
30 I said that day I said The girlfriend was stupid, like a pig, she twisted me, hurts, and kept relieved. I was in a hurry and said, "I sue you, you to abuse the pig!"
31 one day, with my dad Mom and my brother went to worship Guanyin
. I didn't wake up very much. I said in the front stop:
R n brother: -_____ |||| fat
Bodhisattva: t _____ t |||||||||||||q|ran
32 on FoxPro class in the second year, a teacher starts to order how many people we have in class,
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, hook ... (suddenly stop)
33, the darling mommy called Buy peppercorns.
Mummy: "Go and buy a pound of peppercorns."
: "One pound?!! How to buy so much?" "
A occasionally depressed surprised goes out to buy, and asked specially when he came out of the door:" Are you sure you buy a pound?! "
I answers the white eyes of the old lady!" Khan ...
It after getting to the vegetable market, the more I think about it, why do you buy a pound? Intersection Take out the phone — confirm again!
I answers the same: a pound of peppercorns! Intersection Intersection
28 yuan a pound of peppercorns, the boss told me, bag. When you are going to pay for money, the phone rang ~~~ Mom? Intersection
only listening to the phone roaring: "Wrong! Wrong !!! It's not a pound, not a pound, one or two !!!"
Intersection Intersection Intersection
34 When the house was handed over, there were many people who came and went, and each security guard would ask.
I originally wanted to say that I was the owner, and I often said that I was the landlord ...,
It while the security brain was short circuit, I hurried to run.
35 In the year, the party in the courtyard, I played a "thief", became famous, and was favored by girls. I called me "thief" on weekdays. One day I wandered to the Asian trade, and the Harbin girls, who had a quick word in the class, saw it, and shouted at me excitedly: "Oh, thief -thief -thief", which made me immediately be by the people next to them. Hold ...
The
1 units of blessings, a leader said, "I wish everyone a happy body ..." Hold, nothing.
2 I once helped the boss book a hotel. I would like to ask people if there are any services such as free Internet access, but I couldn't think of what to say, so I asked the other party: "Excuse me, you have here you have any What special services? After a long time of slippers, no, ask everyone: Why did my slippers go?
4 In shopping, my friend suddenly exclaimed: "Wow! 'Virgo Bookstore"! "I was shocked, looked up, a plaque, four big characters on the book
- !!
5 I used to buy lamb skewers
extended 4 fingers to say "3 lamb skewers"
The boss covered "How many?"
I stretched out 3 fingers and said "4" ...
6 Our general manager's surname Zhou, once he called, I was driving, and said nervously, "Premier Zhou ... "
7 My surname is Zhu, management unit machine room. One time someone hit me: "Chicken chief, are you in the pig room?" At that time, the guy scolded the guy for a meal
8 in the cafeteria queued, hearing a boy next to him, "Master, come to the bowl '' Bullets of cauliflower 'soup! "
9 I was very hungry and hungry at a meal at the rice restaurant.
finally couldn't bear to hold the table roaring. I wanted to say that I couldn't get on the rice line. I lifted the table!
The results: "The boss !!!! I will eat the table without getting on the rice line !!!!"
The silent 3 seconds of the shop to the table ... shame ...
10 My parents quarreled, and my dad said angrily: "I roll it out!"
11 in high school in high school, after A scored a ball, it was passed to B selflessly, B easy to score. After a while, B got the ball, A shouted to pass the ball loudly. B casts the ball by himself. As a result, A was angrily shouting: I really blinded my dog's eyes ...
The smile of the audience
12 Impression of the squad leader in elementary school was extremely serious. After boiling, the squad leader finally couldn't bear it after the order was maintained several times. He stood up and shouted at the table: Who quarreled and interrupted his mouth !!! ... When the whole class was quiet
n13, we Asked how the battle of a buddy Manchester United said, he said excitedly: "Manchester United lost, Beckham received two yellow plates!" n
15 When I was in college, a teacher gave lectures and talked about a new type of material, saying: "The sexual function of this material is unparalleled by old materials ... ah no, performance and function ..."
16 just went to college, military training, the company commander did not know where the accent was, shouting password- "to the left!" "Stepping the right drill!"
17 Girls order: Master, stir -fry a plate of hot and sour potato shreds, do not put potatoes!
18 In the second year of high school, our Chinese teacher was an old teacher who had just transferred from Nanchang to Beijing. His accent was heavy. His son was on the Department of Tsinghua Architecture, which was also his purpose of coming to Beijing. He was proud of his son. He always talked about his son. Tsinghua) University toad (architecture). .. ..
If the moth is there, wouldn't it be a snack if you arrived at the frog and toad. .. ..
19 cooking at noon, my mother gave me a pot of carrots: "Go, cut the carrot into meat!"
20 asked me together yesterday. How to write the festival? I replied: Add a festival to the festive festival under the festive head! All the staff are hilarious! I didn't respond for a while ~~~~~~~~!
21 When I was looking for a job that year, the examiner asked me to graduate from the year.
I originally wanted to say in 2000, and the result was excited: "Two thousand years ago ..."
is more than the waterfall sweat. . "
22 just after 10 minutes of class, I raised my hand at the same table and said: Teacher I want to go to the toilet.
The English teacher said very unhappy: How big are you going to the toilet?
22 He has a classmate who has been reviewing the third level of the computer. One day he played football, and the other classmate took the ball to the bottom line. He only listened to him shouting: Enter! Enter! (Chuanzhong)
23 Remember to buy a fruit called Elizabeth once. I opened my mouth and said: Boss, how much is Shakespeare? The boss stayed on the spot
24 Physics teacher's talk: "This is a thick spring, I push it from both ends, see, is it confidential (constipation)?"
25 Listen to classmates,
. A girl in their dormitory once went to buy sanitary napkins,
said to the boss: a pack of sanitary napkins.
The boss actually asked: Do you want three fresh or spicy?
Then the classmate froze and said, "Sanxian, I'm afraid that I can't stand it. Essence Essence
26 Master of the University, on education psychology. Late ... Enter the classroom. I glanced at the blackboard. The old professor was angry and asked the sister to answer the question of the blackboard. u003CSexy and Sexual Theory>, this is too difficult to talk about. "The whole class turned up. (Note. Professor original title: u003Core -rational and sensuality>
2 50 new mouths have fallen into the earth! ——Liexiakou 2007 Cool Hot Edition (ZT)
27 I was sitting on the ground as a very good male classmate. I asked for a concern: "Your buttocks hurt!" As a result, I accidentally said it. "Your butt is killed." Khan ~~~ The brother stood up and patted his buttocks, put a fart, and said, "No death, still panting!" I fainted
28 and The leader and other people drank, raised the wine glass and said loudly: "Let's do everything!" At that time, the brain was too hot ......
29 once, our newspaper photographer interviewed a female star to return, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star, in the return of a female star. Talking about how he and the star are familiar at the meeting. The boss looked at a lot of photos on the table and opened a joke: I see you have become his royal photographer. Throughout the sound of "Japan". Since then, this poor photographer is called "Daily Photographer". When he works overtime, of course, he has become "Night". , Is there any hand paper to fill the hunger card?
31 We have colleagues on business trips and dealers ask for dinner. The dealer should urinate. The dealer said that there is a bathroom on the opposite side. If you go to the door, we are said to the door. Those who eat opposite can be free. In order to save two cents, our colleagues walked straight and said straightforwardly to the toilet: "I'm here to eat!" After the year, the customer called when the goods arrived before the festival, because these days in the past few days, I couldn't figure out the content of the order, so I asked: What are you?
33 I have a friend who has just watched the Biography of the Heroes of the Eagle. I am very interested in the "Dog Stick Stick" and often jokes to others.
A day as usual. He kicked others. Drinking: "Kick the dog's legs!" Everyone laughed, and he felt embarrassed, and he kicked and shouted, "Dogs kick your legs!" R N I want to find a job in a restaurant
because it is still a child, and it is the first time to work. Ask if you need to be more implicitly
This results: "Manager, do you need a thug here?"
In almost found a hole in a hole
35 to the market once to the market once Buy vegetables and prepare to dinner. A Korean friend bought lettuce and wanted 2 pieces. He gave all the change on his body to hawkers and lacked a dime, so he said to hawkers-
"My hair is given to you, so there is no hair. "
. The hawker was dumb, for a long time, answered-
" I don't want your hair. " "
36 The manager generally said to smoking: All those who smoke are strangled !!
37 When KFC out of Fragrant Wings, because I did not look at the advertisement, it was Listening to others, I always thought it was Liu Xiang spoke to KFC. When he arrived, he told the waiter that I wanted Liu Xiang to show his wings ...
38 kfc Sudan Red Incident, I went to KFC, the waiter asked, you, you, you What do you want? I didn't think about it: a pair of Sudan red. The waiter immediately had a sturdy expression
39 to get off work with a few colleagues a few days ago with a few colleagues. A lot, a fat waiter was busy, and shouted together, "The waiter ~~", the girl ran over: "How many nodes? "At that time, we fell all, and then went to this dinner again. When ordering," the waiter's checkout ", and then shouted" Order! " Intersection "
40 meets a colleague in the bathroom at noon. Suddenly I didn't know what word to say hello. The ghost asked God to ask," Did you eat it? " "Asked, I was annoyed and embarrassed. The colleague replied:" Eat, what about you? "I am dizzy ~~~~~~
41 My colleague will ask the exchange rate of the RMB and the yen. Several brother watched "Prison" and performed the shot of the killing of the blade from his mouth. The boss suddenly popped out: "I K, I can talk and serve in the blade. Essence Essence "
43 At noon one day, my mother asked the elder brother to move the dining table. My brother didn't move for a long time, and the mother said like this:
" Hear hear hearing No? ! Tell you to move the table for two kilometers "
= _ = !!!
44 Chairman of the Trade Union to give a generous speech, the last sentence reached the climax: gay, let us this year的工作做得比明年更好！全场皆倒。 rnrn45 我们老师很厉害，有一天他这么说："把作业拿出来，我们对一下答案，对的打叉，然后Write the correct answer on it ... "
46 called a friend who has not been contacted for a long time, and learned that he was applying for" suspension of salary "
n47 so many coquettish rivers and mountains, Lead countless heroes to shoot big sculptures ...
48 Go to the cinema to watch "Pirates of the Caribbean", there is a trailer for "Transformers" before the movie. When he got up "Megatron", he couldn't remember his team called "Battay Tiger". Because it was too excited, he exclaimed a little "really handsome, Nanba Tian! "
The is terrible at that time, there was no sound effect at that time, and N -many people stared at me and laughed ... I lost the dead!
49 and a group of friends to eat
It is estimated that a person is betrayed by his brother, and the depressed is sullen and drank a lot of beer, and then he stood up and yelled at
Brothers! Not to be sold!!
It estimated that I wanted to say it. I wanted to say it. Brothers are not used to sell
At the time, there were more than a dozen people on a table of people lying on the table.
1. One day, a fudge walks on the street.
. She was walking and suddenly said, "Ah! My legs are so soft!"
2, there was a surname of a person in the past,
Eat myself ....
3, a banana and a girlfriend dating, walking on the street, the weather is hot, Mr. Banana took off his clothes, and then his girlfriend fell down
4. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and flowed a lot of blood and became red beans; the pus has been flowing, and it became a soybean; the wound was scarred, and the black beans finally became black beans.
5, one day, the bean paste bag was walking on the road, and suddenly a car accident, the belly was broken. Before dying, he looked at his belly and said, "Oh, I am a bean paste bag."
6, Xiaoming Xinyin's hair, came to school the next day, the classmates saw his new hairstyle and laughed: Xiaoming, your head shape is like a kite! Xiaoming felt very wronged and ran outside and crying. Crying and crying ~ He flew up ...
7, the match stick suddenly felt itchy, so he reached out and scratched himself and burned himself to death.
8, on board, a young lady asked a little girl and said, "Why wouldn't the plane fly as high as the stars? 'Ah! "
9, there is a pair of corn fell in love
So they decided to get married
The day of marriage
The popcorn beside: Have you seen our corn?
popcorn: dear, people wore a wedding dress
10, one day, a three -point steak walking on the street, suddenly he saw a five -pointer steak in front, but there was no I would be
Q: Why didn't they say hello?
Answer: Because they are not familiar with ...
11, there is a fat man ... Next ...
The result became .........
dead fat man ..
12, a green apple went out to go shopping, and suddenly saw a red apple, he Just say to the Red Apple ...
The secret love me, otherwise why do you blush ...
13, the teacher played a Beethoven's song at the music class
Xiaoming asked Xiaohua: "Do you understand music?"
Xiaohua: "Yes"
Xiaoming: "Do you know what the teacher is playing?"
Xiaohua: "Piano."
14 , Xiao A said to Xiao B: Dig plug .... It's raining outside! Intersection I saw it
Is Little B very excited: Yeah, I saw you
15, the snake asked the big snake brother in a panic .. "Brother, are we poisonous?" The big snake said: "You ask, ask Why do you? "Xiao Snake said:" I accidentally bit my tongue just now. "
16, I used to go shopping together with tomato armor and tomato B
and then suddenly a truck rushed out one day. Pressing the tomato armor in the past
Tomato B pointed at the tomato armor and laughed
[Ha. Ha. Harbin sauce ~]
17, turtle and rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran Go to the front ..
This to see a snail climb very slowly and slowly .. Say to him: You come up, I will carry you ...
and then .. Snail comes up ...
. After a while ... the turtle saw another ant .. Say to him: You come up too ...
So the ant also came up. .
In the ant came up .. Seeing the snail above .. I said "Hello"
Do you know what the snail is said ??
Snail said: You hurry up, this, this, this The turtles are so fast ...
18, Xiaoming said, "Akang, ask you" a shark ate a mung bean, what did it become? "
said," I said, "I am I do n’t know, what is the answer? "
Xiaoming said:" The answer is "mung bean paste (mung bean shark)", you are stupid! "
19, Xiaoming went to the classroom to say: There are many ants in the toilet,
The teacher suddenly thought of the word ANT of Ant, so I tested Xiaoming: What does the ant say?
Xiaoming's face was blank ............ I said:
ants ...
20, teacher: "You finally came! Why did you come to class yesterday without class? ? "
Student:" Because .. Because my mother fell off the stairs ... "
The teacher:" Oh! So that, the mother was injured, so you didn't come. "Student : "No ... my dad was injured ..."
Teacher: "Why do your mother fall off the stairs from the stairs?" Student: "Because ... my dad has a woman outside ..."
: What ?. What does it have to do with your mother falling off the stairs? "
Student: Because of their fight .. My mother fell and my dad was injured by my mother."
Teacher: "Oh ... so because you sent your father to the hospital, so did you not come to class?"
students: "No .., the woman outside sent my dad."
: "Then why didn't you come to class?"
Student: "Because I have slept over my head ..."
The teacher: "What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs!" N student: "No, I ... I just mention it by the way ..."
21, son: "Mom! Give me 100 yuan."
Mother: "No!"
: "If you give me 100 yuan, I will tell you, you are not here this afternoon, what your father says to the maid."
In the mother listened, and quickly took out 100 yuan for him!
: "Dad said," Don't forget to hot clothes later "..."
22, worm: Xiaohua, do you use my pencil?
Xiaohua: No, I am useless.
Words: Are you really useless?
Xiaohua: I'm really useless!
Sworm: Alas, you are the 17th person who admits that he is useless
23, one day Xiaoqiang asked his father: "Dad, am I silly child?" Dad said, "Stupid child How can you be a silly child? "
24, a chief of a babies said to a person who was about to be executed,: What do you have?
He said: I want to eat lychee.
This chief said: This season did not pull
This he said: I can wait
25, one day, a family of fire,
The son is still inside.
M mother shouted outside the house,
"Son ... You are doing it ... you can't get out ..."
Sons answered ... "I'm wearing socks ..."
M mother said, "What socks are you wearing a fire ..."
The son hasn't come out yet ...
The mother shouted nervously, "Son, what are you doing? Come out ~ It's a fire, staying in it ..."
The son said, "I'm taking off socks ..."
26, two steamed buns love each other
So they decided to get married
The day of marriage
By the other steamed bun
, the steamed bun asked the flower roll next to me: Did you see our steamed bun?
Flower rolls: dear, people's heads
27, a pair of men and women are eating dinner
That girl always asked the boy: Do you love me?
I continued to eat dinner at a glance
The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me?
Is finally said: Love
girls ask again: How do you prove?
Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket,
and asked the girl: Do you have ten yuan?
The girls took ten yuan to the boy. Yuan put it on the table
. After a while .....
The girl is very angry and asked the boy: Do you want to prove that you love me
The boy said that I have proved it! !!
Forty in front of you!
The long time ago, there was a beautiful love story. In the story of the male and female protagonists in the story, for their love, they need to abandon their beliefs and endure the contempt of the world. , You're from Lao La ~
Guessing puzzle: Standing with two cows standing next to one bull, guessing three words
Answer: Three -headed cow
4. Stone and rice cake fights, stones fly up I kicked the rice cake into the sea in one foot ..............
The lovers have been in the past for a lifetime, but the boys need to take military service, so they dated the girls and gave the girl a diamond ring. I met the girl today after the year. At that time, the ring was used as a wedding ring. After 3 years, the girl had been waiting for the boy, but she couldn't wait. She was too sad. She threw the diamond ring into the sea. , Walk away in the country. However, the boy actually has been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood the dating place, so she always became her legacy
. Fishing, guess what he caught?
year cakes !!!
5. Dumplings are boys or girls
Answer Boys because dumplings have foreskin
6. One day when he was hit by a car, he yelled, "Oh!" Since then, he has become Xiaohuang
!!
9. When will Taiwan want to unify?
Is when buying instant noodles
10. A pine and Abai have nothing to chat with each other.
A Song: "Recalling children's time, the happiest is Children's Day."
Aba: "After ten years is Youth Day."
Ason The year is Father's Day. "
Abai:" It's the Old Man's Day in more than decades. "
Aatong:" Another decades. "
Abai:" Qingming "
11. Soldiers:" Thirst ... thirst ... "
Cao Cao:" Everyone persist for a while! I used to go to this place, remember that there is a Merlin nearby, and then go for a while
may be here "
The soldiers:" Oh ￣￣￣￣ ￣￣￣￣ r ￣￣￣ ￣￣￣ ￣￣￣ "
half an hour later -Cao Ren:" Lord! The expedition found the team found the team! A lot of water sources! "
Cao Cao:" Hahahaha, do you hear it? Finally, there is a water "
After a group of animals opened the party, they rushed into the 7-11 convenience store to buy things. Because they were too noisy, they were beaten out by the clerk, but leaving the lamb in the store alone. Why?
The convenience store is not snoring for 24 hours ..............
22. The glass and coffee cup cross the road. Suddenly someone shouted: The car is coming!
This cup was hit by the car, but the coffee cup was okay. Why?
The coffee cup has ears!
43. Xiaohong asked: When you mix coffee, use your right hand or left hand
Xiaomei said: right hand
Xiaohong said: Oh, you are so amazing, you will not be afraid of hotness, like me like me, like me All spoons.
44. Do you know why penguins live in Antarctica?
Because it is cold there ...
46. A logging worker go to work at
Workers: You can try it in the forest in front ... see you can see a few trees in one minute ... ..
After a minute ....
Workers: Wow ... 20 trees in one minute ... too amazing ... Where did you work before?
Workers: Sahara Forest ...
Gongtou: I haven't heard of it ... I have only heard of the Sahara Desert ..............................
Workers: Yes ... later changed the name!
47. Wife: I am really blind. I will marry you when I step on shit.
: I am really blind to marry you when I step on the shit.
This shit: I am unlucky! Lying there and being stepped on by you ...
48. Tell a story. In the past, a pair of lovers set a lifetime, but the boys needed to take military service, so they set an oath with the girls
, and gave the girls a one. Diamond ring, promised to meet the girl today three years later. At that time, the ring was used as
for a wedding ring.
has finally passed by 3 years, but the boy heard the news of the woman getting married on the return of the home. He was too sad, and despairing
thrown the diamond ring into the sea. Three days later, the ship leaned as shore. The boy went to the small restaurant on the street for dinner. A fish came on. He pinched
The fish took a bite, bit into a hard thing, spit it out, guess what he saw ????????
!!!!!!!!!!!!!
53. One day, a pair of black stool saw a white stool,
black stool asked: Why are you growing so beautiful and so beautiful Intersection
This stool is very angry!
He said: I am not a bowel movement! I am an ice cream !!!
55. A software company is recruiting
This day, a dog came to apply for application. The supervisor felt very depressed and wanted to drive the dog out. The dog took out a piece of paper and a pen, and wrote a few words very neatly: Please do not discriminate against animals. The director knew that this was not an ordinary dog. Out of curiosity, he decided to try it. The director took out the condition of the application and read: 1. You must type. 2. Must be programmed. 3. At least proficient in a foreign language. So before the dog came to the computer, he played an article very skilled and wrote a very complicated program. Then
came to the supervisor and said to the supervisor: Meow! Intersection
1. There was a altar buried underground. After a thousand years, what did it become?
Answer: alcohol.
2. There is a dog, it goes and goes to the United Kingdom.
Answer: DOG.
3. Teachers in the class should draw up the Northern Song Dynasty, piglets, puppies, and kittens. Who will the teacher call?
Is; puppy, because Wangwang Xianbei (first back).
4. Which two vegetables have mobile phones?
: radish and greens, because of radish and greens, each has Sony Ericsson (love).
5. Why do people go to bed to sleep?
: The bed will not come over by yourself.
6. If there is a car, the driver is prince and the passenger is princess. Who is this car?
: If.
7. Jinmu, water, fire and soil, who has the longest leg?
: Fire, because of ham sausage.
8. Butterflies, ants, spiders, crickets, they worked together, which one did not get paid in the end?
: , because 蜈 (non -merit) is not affected by Lu.
9. The nose of the elephant in the zoo is the longest. Who is the second longest?
Answer: small elephant.
10. It turned out to be the Spartan 800 Warriors. Why did the movie become 300?
Answer: Wu Bai went to sing ~~
The first one is more funny
This story took place in an ancient temple 200 years ago. He was horrible first, funny in the middle, and finally tragic. Think about it before.
The ghostly fart. Essence Dead
The white rabbit jumping to the bread room, asking, "Boss, do you have a hundred small bread?"
More "
" like this ... "The little white rabbit walked down with a desire.
The next day, the little white rabbit jumps to the bread room, "Boss, is there a hundred small bread?"
The boss: "I'm sorry, still not" Ah ... "The little white rabbit walked down again.
The third day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bread room, "Boss, is there a hundred small bread?"
The boss said happily: "Yes, yes, today we have the One hundred small bread !! "
The white rabbit took out the money:" Great, I buy two! "
(2)
In the forest,
On the road, it encountered a giraffe that was rolling marijuana,
The white rabbit said to the giraffe giraffe, why do you do something hurt yourself?
to see See how beautiful this forest is, let's run together in nature!
It giraffe to see marijuana cigarettes and see the little white rabbit, so throw the cannabis smoke behind him,
Running in the forest.
In the elephant who was preparing to suck Gochine,
The white rabbit said to the elephant What about it?
In look at how beautiful this forest is, let's run together in nature!
It elephants to see the cocaine and look at the little white rabbit, so take the cocaine behind Throw,
follow the little white rabbit and giraffe running in the forest.
In the lion that is preparing to hit the sea*,
The white rabbit said to the lion: lion lion, Why do you do something hurting yourself?
In see how beautiful this forest is, let us run together in nature!
Lion to look at the syringe and see the little white rabbit, so let's take it The syringe threw it behind him, and the little white rabbit was having a meal fiercely
Elephant and giraffe scared to shake: Why do you want to hit the little white rabbit?
The is so kind, care about us The health of the health also calls us close to nature.
The lion said angrily: This bastard rabbit, every time I stabbed*pill, I pulled me
. (3)
The first day, the little white rabbit went to fish by the river, and he couldn't catch anything. He went home.
The next day, the little white rabbit went to fish by the river again, and he still caught anything and went home.
On the third day, the little white rabbit just arrived at the river, and a big fish jumped out of the river and yelled at the little white rabbit:
Is fucking to dare to use Hu Yibu as a bait, I am Just flatten you!
(4)
In order to test the strength of the police of the United States, Hong Kong, and mainland China, the United Nations put three rabbits in three forests to see who found the rabbit first. N's first forest was an American police. They spent half a day for a full half -day meeting to formulate combat plans, strict division of labor, and then sent special troops to quickly enter the forest for carpet search. As a result, the meeting was delayed. R n Then it was the Hong Kong police officer. They sent more than 100 people and dozens of police cars to line up outside the forest. ...... 半天过去了, 没动静. 飞虎队进入森林, 搜索一遍, 没结果, 任务失败! rn最后是中国警察, 只有四个, 先打了一天麻将, 黄昏时一人Take a police stick into the forest. Within five minutes, when a scream of animals came from the forest, the Chinese police pumped a cigarette and said and laughed. Later, a bear with a swollen face was dragged. By: Don't fight anymore, I am a rabbit .........
(five)
The white rabbit walks in the forest. I gave the little white rabbit two big ear stickers and said, "I let you not wear a hat. Little White Rabbit is very wronged.
The next day, she walked out of the house with a hat and met again. In the big gray wolf, he stepped up and "slap" and gave the little white rabbit two big mouths, saying "I let you wear a hat. "
This is depressed. After thinking about it for a long time, I finally decided to go to the Tiger of the Forest Tiger to complain.
Explaining the situation, the tiger said," Okay, I know, I will deal with this matter. I will deal with it. I want to believe in the organization. "On the same day, the tiger found his buddies." You can't do this, it makes it difficult for me to do it. "Said to wipe the ash on the table:" Can you see like this? " You can say that rabbits come over and find a piece of meat for me! She found fat, and you said you want to be thin. She found thin, and you said you want to be fat. Can't you beat her? Of course, you can say that. Rabbit came and found me a woman. She found it full, and you said you like slim. She found a slimmer, and you said you like plump. It can be rational and powerful and powerful. "The big gray wolf nodded frequently, clapped his hands quickly, and rushed to the new peak again. Unexpectedly, the above guidance work was heard by the little white rabbit who was weeding to the tiger's house. . This hate in my heart.
The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. Why is it so coincidental? The big gray wolf said, "Rabbit, come here, find me a piece of meat for me go. "Rabbit said," Then, are you fat or thin? " "The big ash wolf listened, sinking in his heart, another joy, and his heart, fortunately, there was a plan B. He also said," Rabbit, Mali Er finds me a woman. "Rabbit asked:" Then, do you like plump or slim? " "The big gray wolf was silent for 2 seconds, and raised his hand more severely to the rabbit two big ears." Damn, I let you not wear a hat. "
(6)
Xiong and rabbits are in the forest. After the bear asked the rabbit," Are you hairy? " "The rabbit said," Not dropped ~ "
So the bear picked up the rabbit to wipe the buttocks. ? "
The boss said," No. "
T" Little White Rabbit asked, "Is there a carrot? "
In I don't know how many days, a little black rabbit came to this store and asked the boss:" Boss, do you have carrots? "
" The boss shook his head angrily: "No. "
This Black Rabbit ran away" 嗖 "after listening.
The next day the Black Rabbit came to this store again to ask:" Boss, is there a carrot? " "
The boss was very angry:" No! " Ask me again and pull your teeth with pliers! "
This Black Rabbit ran away" 嗖 "after listening.
The third day, the Black Rabbit came to this store again, and asked timidly:" Boss, do you have pliers? " "
" The boss said angrily, "No. "
T" Little Black Rabbit asked, "Is there a carrot? "
The boss was angry, grabbed the little black rabbit, took out a small hammer, and knocked off the teeth of the little black rabbit.
The fourth day of the Black Rabbit came to this store again, vague Unclear asked: "Boss, is there a carrot juice? "
(9)
The giraffe said: Little rabbit, I really hope you can know how good a long neck is. No matter what delicious things, I will slowly pass me when I eat it. Long neck, that delicious can enjoy for a long time.
The rabbit looked at him expressionlessly.
and in summer, rabbits, the cold water slowly flowing through my long neck, it was so It's delicious. There is a long neck! Rabbit, can you imagine it?
The rabbit said slowly: Have you spit it?
(ten)
One day, kangaroos drove in the car in the car On the road of the countryside, I suddenly saw the little white rabbit in the middle of the road, and the ears and body were almost lying on the ground and seemed to be listening to what ...
So the kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously: "Little White Rabbit What are you listening to? "
" A large truck passed by half an hour ago ... "
" Wow .. So God! ..How did you know? .. "
" He XX! My neck and legs are so broken .. "
The child is called Xiao Ming ...
Xiaoming is particularly stupid ...
So Xiaoming's mother wanted to throw Xiao Ming away ...
So he ...
Mom said, "Xiao Ming, how good you look at the zoo ... There are elephants ... Tiger ... "
then ·, my mother took the car home ...
and then ... 12 o'clock in the middle of the night
The door bell sounded; Ding Dong ... Ding Dong ... ...
M mother to open the door ...
Xiaoming stood at the door ... "Mom. I came back ... "
So the next day ... the next day ...
M mother made a train · bring Xiaoming to the zoo in the suburbs ... N mother said, "Xiao Ming, how good you see this zoo ... There are elephants
Tigers ... you play with them · Mom goes to buy ice cream ... "
So my mother returned home by the train ...
and then ... 12 o'clock in the middle of the night
The doorbell rang; Ding Dong ... Ding Dong ... ...
M mother to open the door ...
Xiaoming stood at the door ... "Mom.我回来了····” rnrn······· rn第三天· 妈妈决心一定要把小明扔掉··· rn于是妈妈坐飞机Taking Xiaoming to · Foreign Zoo ...
Mom said, "Xiaoming, how good you see this zoo ... There are elephants
tigers ... You play with them · Mom goes to buy you ice cream ... "
·······
then my mother bought a aircraft ticket by herself. At night ... 12 o'clock ...
The doorbells did not sound ...
and then another day ...
Life
·········
The that is like this ...
M mother threw Xiaoming away ...
Star
. The celebrity is more popular than Mike Jackson. n's day of Masong ...
everyone goes to pick up the plane ...
The airport is full of people ·
So there were four planes ·
The first plane landed ...
people all shouted, "Masongma Song ...! Intersection "
. But ...
The Liu Dehua is going down the plane ... ... So Andy Lau gone ...
The second plane landed ...
everyone shouted: Masongma pine!!!!!
, but Zhang Xueyou came down from the plane ...
Then Zhang Xueyou also left ...
The third plane landed ...
The people shouted: Matson Ma Song!!!!!
So came down to Guo Fucheng ...
So Guo Fucheng also left ... ·
The fourth plane is here ...
everyone shouted: Matson Ma Song!!!!!! Who is going down ...
······························· n
dawn ...? Isn't it drip ...
is Xiaoming ...
I ...
too long, but it is really cold ~ you look at it slowly
I. Seagulls
Q: There is a man who is a blind man. He had a sea difficulty when he was young. After many years, he went around the place. He ordered 1 sea in a restaurant by the sea
gull meat. After he ate it, he called the waiter and asked if it was a seagull meat. The waiter replied that it was, and then the man committed suicide. Why?
. Jumping the train
Q: A person takes the train to the neighboring town to see a doctor. On the way back, the train passed through a tunnel, and the person jumped from
. Why? rn三.水草rn问：有个男人跟他女友去河边散步，突然他的女友掉进河里了，那个二子就急忙跳到水里去找，可没r N found his girlfriend, he left here sadly. After a few years, he swims back. At this time, he saw an old man fishing, but the old
He asked the old bald donkey why the fish did not touch a little water grass, and the old man said: The river never
has long water plants. Speaking of the man suddenly jumped into the water and committed suicide.
. The story of the funeral
Q: There are three mothers and daughters, the mother died, the sisters went to the funeral, the sister met a very handsome distant relative at the funeral, and gave him
at first sight. But the man was gone after the funeral, and the sister couldn't find him. After a month, my sister killed her sister,
why? rn五.半根火柴rn问：有一个人在沙漠中，头朝下死了，身边散落着几个行李箱子，而这个人手里紧紧地抓着半个火柴r n, how did this person die?
6. Full ground wood cutting
Q: There are two dwarfs in the circus, blind dwarf is shorter than another dwarf, the circus needs only one dwarf, of course the dwarf in the circus is
The shorter, the better. Two dwarfs decide to be shorter than whom. He died. I only found the furniture made of wood and the wood chips on the ground at his house. Ask him why
committed suicide?
. Seven. Tap the door in the middle of the night
Q: A person lives in the hut on the top of the mountain, and he heard a knock on the door in the middle of the night. R n knocked on the door, went to open the door, or no one, if it was a few times. The next day, someone found a dead corpse at the foot of the mountain, and the police came to take away the
of the mountain. Why?
1, before being trapped with a girlfriend with his girlfriend, his girlfriend said to her flesh to say that it was a seagull meat. He lived and his girlfriend did not eat. After the taste of the meat, I knew the difference, suicide
2. After the tunnel, I thought I was blind again, and the psychological collapse and committed suicide
3.一次看到那个帅哥rn5，热气球出问题，需要扔1个东西和人，气球上人抽火柴决定谁被扔下去，那个倒霉的孩子抽到了半根被扔下来了，r N6, Gaopuscus cut off the furniture legs of the blind dwarf, let the blind man think that he grew taller, so he committed suicide
7, and the deceased went up the mountain again and again, but pushed up and down when the owner of the house opened the door again and again.
Citizens can't do it!
The father looked at his son's accumulation order and found that there were several subjects that were not as good as
Father: Your foreign geography is not good
: Because I have never been to a foreign country!
Father: Your history is not good
: I was born too late, most of the previous things do not know.
Father: How can citizens fail?
This: I am not an adult, isn't it a citizen at all! Intersection
___ The first episode of fun news.
The high school classmates told me that one time he took a bus with his classmates, because his classmates were fat and did not repair the border, he
shortly after the classmate got on the car, there was a little sister who used it very much. The naive and lovely voice said: Auntie. This sitting position allows you to sit.
This classmates are very strange. Why would this little girl want to sit down and let her, so he asked curiously: Why do you let
to the eldest sister? Intersection Unexpectedly, the little sister repaired with a strong repulsive answer: The teacher said that when he saw a pregnant woman, he would be
to give up! Intersection … The whole car is dumb!
Stocks are courage ...
During the philosophy of a university, they taught what kind of courage is. A student on the test papers
"Write" This is "this is to make it. .. .. As a result, I got a ... ……
___
The last lesson
In the last lesson, the teacher asked: Does anyone want to express their opinions? Afu posted ...
Afu: The teacher taught very well.
The teacher nodded happily, and asked: Then you think it is worthless to push with your classmates ...
Afu: Very worth ...
The teacher smiled very satisfied: What is your reason?
Afu said slowly: Sit. Harmful. he….
I only saw the teacher's face suddenly changed ...
college students
In a college student to work in his uncle's farm in the summer vacation. One king,
and asked him if he would squeeze ... College students said: I am a college student, there is nothing that can't. After 1 hour. 2 small
... 3 hours ... After a long time, he finally came back. Uncle asked: Why is that time? College students replied: Squeeze milk
is easy, but it is more troublesome to let the cattle sitting on the pedal.